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David Jenkins's avatar

Churches can serve as a third place, but with church attendance declining, other possibilities are used. Social media fulfills this role for some, but it lacks the personal connection people need.

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Fred First's avatar

Yes, we are hoping to establish a church connection. The facility is managed by Lutheran Senior Services and there is a chapel on campus. We have been Lutherans in the past, and every other flavor of Protestant. I have not had any Christian friends over the years, but many hopeful agnostics are among them.

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Kathy Barron's avatar

After my husband died, I was busy creating third places to go. I have three Public Gardens I volunteer at every week, two monthly book clubs, several weekly walks with different friends and two weekly zoom meetings, plus tutoring two ESL students twice a week. I certainly agree we need those third places!

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Fred First's avatar

I know it is not easy to make those first contacts and then hang in any group until it feels less alien and energy-sucking. Starting new in anything is energy -intensive. But it must be done, or else spiral down the drain in isolation and loneliness. I'm glad you found your people and places!

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randall wells's avatar

Right on. Need places to get away to get together. For discussion: how does a religious service fit in?

With coffee hour afterward. I used to enjoy the Lions Club in Conway, SC--functional ambiance, banana puddin', crowded with interesting men. To of my pals used to have coffee at Nye's Pharmacy.

Beer on Friday afternoons, a couple of universities. My favorite 3rd places are at friends' houses. RW

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Fred First's avatar

We have been at the Methodist church in Floyd long enough now that it is starting to have some of the "familiar regulars" feel to it. Lions Club. That's an idea. We will have to see what kind of comes in the package re already-established meeting groups and places in CoMo. It's a clean slate. We hope to fill it up quickly, but not overfill.

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Sally White's avatar

Thank you, Fred. I'm in awe of your journey into this next life adventure, and I'm learning a lot from your candid sharing of it. You and I are "of an age," though here we are taking no such deliberate, preemptive steps into the future. We didn't lighten our load nearly so much when we moved to NY several years ago, for example. But we had the opportunity for a few years to care for his mother until her death at 99. I always marveled at her ability to adjust to new conditions and settings and make new friends wherever she went. From independent senior living, to stays in rehab, to assisted living and memory care, she accepted and she thrived. COVID took much of that social aspect away from her at the end and likely made her all the more willing to leave.

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